Preschool shopping: "Since that BUS accident, we don't do field trips anymore."

Preschool shopping in Huntsville was a mind bender.

Once we had settled on our general locale, there were actually very few choices - about 6, but I'll only tell you about the 4 memorable ones. I spent an entire morning doing the "drop in interviews"

Preschool #1 -

Would be "super dee duper" close to home. Yeah! I always like convenience.

This is where I received shock #1 - school begins a month earlier in AL than in CA, which is what we were basing our move date on. (Please don't point out that I just finished a sentence with a preposition.)

Shock #2 - Curriculum Nazis - wolves in previously stay at home mom's clothing. The assistant director explained, "Here at our really great preschool, we have an excellent academic program. The preschoolers use a phonics based reading program and almost ALL of the 4 yr old class WILL be reading by Christmas. 4 year old Preschool is 5 days a week. We really need the children to be here ALL 5 DAYS so that we can cover all of the curriculum. We do provide a half day option so that if you ARE a stay at home mom, and you DO want to spend the afternoons with your children, you CAN. [read - we really can raise your children better than you, but we'll let you feel like you're helping if that makes you happy] We include most of the academic material in the morning so that those children who go home in the afternoon will not miss any of the curriculum."

Ok - wow - I really didn't expect to get the condescending to stay at home mom attitude in ALABAMA. My realtor assures me this is not typical. Also - a good friend of mine uses this curriculum at her private school and assures me that not all schools that use the curriculum are so "heil curriculum."

I was hoping we'd be living a more slow, relaxed life in Alabama, not a strict, regimented life, where preschool makes you afraid. I guess I forgot I was in the midst of a major military presence.

"If your child happens to miss school," she continued "we will send work home for them to make up."

It was at this point I wanted to laugh out loud hysterically - Emma probably only went 75% of school last year between her own kiddo sick days and all the traveling we did. Later, when I was filling out the registration forms because it became clear that schools were filling up and this might be the only reasonably close place for school, the Principal further addressed the issue:

"This form allows us to give your child medication. That way if they're sick, we can keep them at school. So they don't miss any of the curriculum." My husband was standing right next to me and can confirm that I am not exaggerating.

Please, Dear God, I prayed - let the other school I liked have a slot open for Emma.


Preschool # 2:

It was spring break (at almost every school except curriculum cult school - I don't think they take any days off), so it was hard to gauge. But the very kind older woman in the office offered to make me some photo copies of the registration forms. Imagine a slightly older Paula Deen, with a limp, and dyed brown hair, but that same sah - weet Southern Belle Drawl.

"State law requires that you fill out this form right here, but where it asks if you give permission for your child to go on field trips, you can just check "NO" because - since that BUS accident last year. We don't do field trips anymore."

I'm not kidding this is one of the first things she said to me. Come to find out later - I don't think THEIR bus was in the accident. It was a news item that resulted in the state making a seat belt law, which meant many Alabama schools logistically could not take preschoolers on field trips anymore. But still. It was so funny and so disturbing that I almost could not contain my hysterical laughter. I really don't think Southerners care as much about marketing as those in So. Cal.

Prechool #3:

My dream school - the walls are painted in Noah's Ark Theme and each room is named after a specific animal. They balance developmental style, child-initiated learning, play and teacher directed, structured learning. It's 4 half-days a week. They include a gross motor skills class (like gym class for little kiddos with obstacle course and balance beam) which my kiddo would definitely benefit from. But - they only have 2 slots left, which might be "boy slots" since they keep a gender balancing quota, and they too were on spring break, so no kiddos and no director, but a very helpful secretary who could answer all my questions and share how she takes her family to Santa Barbara from Alabama so they can have a quiet, relaxing, beautiful vacation that is not overwhelming and overcrazed. Bottom line - I'd have to call the following Monday from CA to meet the director over the phone.


Shock # 3 - almost all the schools have closed circuit tv monitoring. Some you swipe your badge, or get a retina scan or something to pick up your kid, and some you can pay for a webcam subscription to be able to watch your kid from your work or home computer. Um....Californians tend to be a bit more libertarian and generally - institutionalized video surveillance at preschool - just isn't done. And - I didn't expect anything in Alabama to more high-tec - but again with the military industrial complex. My realtor informed me that Huntsville has more engineers per capita than any other city in the US (and maybe world?). I told him that is not a really good selling point.

Shock # 4 - there are not millions of day/time combos. For example, at our current preschool you can attend 2 or 3 or 5 days/wk in the morning, or 2 or 3 or 5 days in the afternoon, or 2 or 3 or 5 full days, and so on. You can choose - stay for lunch or go home for lunch......yes Californians from the big cities are used to many, many choices. Most schools I looked at in HSV had 1 schedule and 1 schedule only.

Preschool #4:

It was hard to hear the administrator since the tv was on at 10:30 am, but I think she said something about making sure each child knows his own name. Enough said.


So - I prayed fervently that Emma could go to school #3. I set my alarm to be able to call at 8:00 AM CST. And - she was accepted. Seriously - I'm not even sure I'd be so excited if, in 14 years, she's accepted to Harvard undergrad. Which is RIDICULOUS - which is EXACTLY what I thought I'd be getting away from by leaving CA where people sign up their kids for preschool the second they have the 20 week ultrasound. Ironic.

And as we finished up the registration on the phone, the woman said, "You can address that ATTN: Ms. Stee-uhl.

"Steel?" I ask

"Stee-uhl" she says.

"Um - can you spell that for me?" I request.

Pause...........

"S-T-I-L-L - Stee-uhl"

"Oh - got it. Thanks!"